Beer Test

[Vince]

Yesterday, scientists suggested that men should take a look at their
beer consumption, considering the results of a recent analysis that revealed
the presence of female hormones in beer.

The theory is that drinking beer makes men turn into women. To test the finding 100 men were fed 6 pints
of beer each. It was then observed that 100% of the men gained weight,
talked excessively without making sense, became overly emotional, couldn't
drive,failed to think rationally, argued over nothing, and refused to apologize
when wrong. No further testing is planned.

[SteveG]

Here is the explanation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How many times have you woken up in the morning after a hard night of
drinking and thought 'How did I get home?' As hard as you try, you cannot
piece together your return journey from the bar to your home. The answer to
this puzzle is that you used a beer scooter.

The beer scooter is a mythical form of transport, owned and leased out to
the drunk by Bacchus the Roman god of wine. Bacchus has branched out since
the decrease in the worship of the Roman pantheon and bought a large batch
of these magical devices.
The beer scooter works in the following fashion:
The passenger reaches a certain level of drunkenness and the slurring gland
begins to give off a pheromone. Bacchus or one of his many sub-contractors
detects the pheromone and sends down a winged beer scooter. The scooter
scoops up the passenger and deposits them in their bedroom via a
trans-dimensional portal.
It is not cheap to run a beer scooter franchise, so a large portion of the
passenger's in-pocket cash is taken as payment. This generates the second
question after a night out 'How did I spend so much money?'.
Beer scooters have a poor safety record and are thought to be responsible
for 90% of all UDI (unidentified drinking injuries).
An undocumented feature of the beer scooter is the destruction of time
segments during the trip. The nature of trans-dimensional portals dictates
that time will be lost, seemingly unaccounted for. This generates the third
question after a night out 'What happened?'
With good intentions, Bacchus opted for the EMIT (embarrassing moments in
time) add on, that automatically allocates (for removal), in descending
order, those parts in time regretted most. Unfortunately one's EMIT is not
necessarily the EMIT of another and quite often lost time is regained over a
suitable period.
Independent studies have also shown that Beer Goggles cause the scooter's
navigation system to malfunction thus sending the passenger to the wrong
bedroom often with horrific consequences.
With recent models including a GPS, Bacchus made an investment in a
scooter-thru chain specialising in half eaten souvlaki and pizza crusts.
Another question answered.
For the family man, beer scooters come equipped with flowers picked from
other people's garden and Thump-A-Lot Boots. These boots are designed in
such a way that no matter how quietly you tip-toe, you are sure to wake up
your other half.
Special anti-gravity springs ensure that you bump into every wall and the
CTSGS (coffee table seeking guidance system) explains the ringbarked shins.

[Green Growler]

lmao lmao lmao

[Jade Flatt]

OI not all women give there men a hard time!!

[Heddleston]

OI not all women give there men a hard time!!

Well true, some blokes are luckily enough to be banged up at Her Majesty's Pleasure lmao lmao lmao lmao

[Jade Flatt]

so funny!

[Orbital]

lmao lmao