Asylum

[rudd86]

WIN A COUNCIL HOUSE

Good morning and welcome to a brand new edition of 'ASYLUM'.

Today's program features another chance to take part in our exciting
competition: Hijack an airliner and win a council house!

We've already given away hundreds of millions of pounds and thousands
of dream homes, courtesy of our sponsor the British Taxpayer. And don't
forget, we're now the fastest growing game on the planet.

Anyone can play, provided they don't already hold a valid British
passport, and you only need one word of English: 'ASYLUM'!.

Prizes include all-expenses-paid accommodation, cash benefits starting
at £180 a week and a chance to earn thousands more begging, mugging and
accosting drivers at traffic lights.

This competition is open to everyone buying a ticket or stowing away
on one of our partner airlines, ferry companies or Eurostar.

No application ever refused reasonable or unreasonable.

All you have to do is destroy all your papers and remember the magic
password: 'ASYLUM'.

Few years ago 140 members of the Taliban family from Afghanistan were
flown Goat Class from Kabul to our international gateway at Stansted
where local law enforcement officers were on hand to fast-track them to
their luxury £200-a-night rooms in the fabulous four star Hilton
Hotel.

They join tens of thousands of other lucky winners already staying in
hotels all over Britain .

Our most popular destinations also include the White Cliffs of Dover
and the world famous Toddington Services area In Historic Bedfordshire.

If you still don't understand the rules, don't forget there's no need
to phone a friend or ask the audience, just apply for legal aid.

Hundreds of lawyers, social workers and counsellors are waiting to
help.

It won't cost you a penny, so play today; it could change your life
forever.

Iraqi terrorists, Afghan dissidents, Albanian gangsters, pro-Pinochet
activists, anti-Pinochet activists, Kosovan drug-smugglers, Tamil
tigers,
bogus Bosnians, Rwandan mass murderers, Somali guerrillas...COME ON
DOWN!

Get along to the airport, get along to the lorry park, get along to
the ferry terminal.

Don't stop in Germany or France .

Go straight to Britain and you are guaranteed to be one of tens of
thousands of lucky winners in the
softest game on earth.

Everyone's a winner, when they play 'ASYLUM'.

[Jimbo]

It would be funny if it wasn't so true!

[Ed]

Very good!

[tom_moran]

the downfall of briton

[CortraGTE]

Quality

[wayne85]

So, so true unfortunately!

[Galahad]

You might want to read the book that 'rudd86' has quoted from.

Its called To Hell in a Handcart by Richard Littlejohn. Excellent read, but more worryingly, has way too much of a grain of truth about it.


http://www.amazon.co.uk/Hell-Handcar...6989834&sr=8-1

[rudd86]

quality, didnt realise it was from a book. I got emailed it by a friend and just posted it on here for a laugh.